The Week That Wasn’t

sick day

Photo by Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash

It’s only a cold.

For crying out loud it’s only a cold! I’ve gotten spoiled.  No longer exposed to young children swapping germs in school settings, no longer taking public transportation, I manage to side-step a good number of these things as they go around.  I can’t say for sure, but I suspect that being so out of practice has only made the experience worse. Aching where I did not know I had nerves, awash in pessimism that I will ever breath again (or think again) – I’ve been here before and will be here again, but holy cow does this try my patience!

During the worst of the misery I read that, among the possible reasons we cough when we are sick is (disturbingly), the nasty little viruses we’re so busy trying to eradicate and expel also “want” to be cast out into the world, to survive in a new, unsuspecting host.  A good, unprotected cough out into the room is their next best chance for a new life.

I am determined not to give it to them. I will not be a human stepping stone on their path toward world domination.  I’m washing my hands like a fiend, coughing Dracula-style, insisting that my husband not come anywhere near my air space or touch anything I’ve touched (no mean feat in a tiny house like ours), and generally behaving like a crazy, paranoid, grumpy human being.  Everytime I feel a sneeze or cough try to break free unexpectedly I think “hah ha! I’m ready for you you little $#&!  But there is an upside to my current preoccupation with germ warfare.

Because I have only managed to trundle between bed and sofa for the last several days, I was right here and on hand to receive one of those IRS Tax Scam calls!  Warning that they were from the IRS Tax Crime Unit (Wow!) and that a warrant had already issued for my arrest (gasp!) and the IRS was already watching both me and my property (the only time I actually felt a little sorry for them), they instructed me in the automated message to call them RIGHT BACK IMMEDIATELY before additional legal procedures were instituted!  And because I wasn’t much able to think about anything else, I had the time to turn in my would-be scammers using the links the IRS has kindly provided us.  Here’s an excellent article summarizing the scammers’ deviousness and growing sophistication (of which mine, I'm afraid, was certainly not a shining example), together with information on how and where to report this, should it happen to you.

Let this be a public service announcement to any and all who are similarly accosted.

Stay well everyone, be thankful for, and guard, your good health, and stay safe out there in the wide world.  I'm beginning to have faith I'll be back out there with you soon!